It’s been awhile, I know.

Peanut has a little tooth making its debut. She’s 10.5 months old already and it’s hard to believe! Spent some time today roasting butternut squash & sweet potatoes to smush into baby food. Easy, doesn’t take too much time & the princess loves it.

And me? Work is consuming my life, both my day job & my side job. My sewing machine is gathering dust, my paintbrushes don’t remember me. I’ve been shooting photos but only commercially and nothing fine art for months. Feeling a little busy and not sure there’s much I can do about it.

Have my eye on a few of these sweet giveaways from Grosgrain Fabulous:

A pretty necklace.

Darling trench coats for my little girl.

There are spiderwebs in the corners of my blog. But in real life, I’ve shot a few engagement & senior photo shoots, painted the dining room, wrapped up the season at work and began work on next year’s marketing materials, and a slew of other life happenings in between.

The dining room is now “confidence” or “blue sage,” depending on which color chip you believe, though looking at it now it’s really not-so-muted aqua. It’s bright, and pretty. The new color plus a rambling, sunny bouquet from the farmer’s market and a poster size print of an old Martini & Rossi poster against the (decorative) fireplace made the room seem so different and cheerful! I can’t believe I didn’t do this before (though, working full time, a wee darling baby girl, etc., etc., certainly kept me busy!).

We signed a lease on a photography studio, and having a physical.space.for.it has already done so much. Sent off some entries to juried photo shows, and waiting to hear back.

And my dear sweet family? Sofia is now six months, which is hard to believe, and into nearly everything! Doing the “army crawl” and closer to a full crawl every day. Hubby is sleeping on the couch as the credits roll; painting took a lot out of us!

The tiny little garden is still in bloom, which is pretty amazing for my brown thumb. A few of the annuals need replacing, but I still get a little dash of bright purples & pinks on my way out the door.

Life is full of color these days. Considering the greys that clouded both my landscape and my moods, this feels nice.

I wanted to write somethingtoday, but it’s nearly time to wrap up the day and get some sleep for The Start of the Week.

In closing, this made me smile. It’s the first time I’ve seen this column, but I’ll subscribe from now on:

Just Drawn That Way, by Michael Arthur.

Salsa!

I am about to slip into my pretty turquoise dress and put a flower pin in my hair (or, not, we’ll see how I feel) and get to the theatre early to train some volunteers before we salsa the night away!!! It’s a fundraiser we’re doing at work, and I think it’s going to be a smash hit.

“The Bachelorette” is on while I’m getting ready, and it. is. making. me. MAD. Things like, letting a guy go because he’s never been in love? and kissing most of the guys in front of the other guys. Gross. And yet, it’s easy background watching.

We had to write our first babysitter instructions for tonight, which felt weird and I’m going to put the paper in our wee one’s baby book. It’s amazing how big she’s getting!!!

Last weekend I spent most of Saturday setting up my attic studio, and have only made it in there twice this week. But twice! Two different days! That’s a start. I probably won’t get any other time this weekend, but that’s ok.

Tomorrow Adeel’s friends are coming up from Charlotte, and the girlfriend owns a sweet cafe down there. So I figured a trip to the farmer’s market was appropriate today (it’s not open on Sundays). Fresh beets, sweet peaches, a pot of mint, fresh homemade goat cheese. Oh, and new potatoes! The supermarket had a special on ribeye, so there you have it: our menu will involve some or all of the above. I’m thinking beet & goat cheese ravioli with roasted garlic (if I get ambitious and have time tomorrow!) and perhaps Korean-marinated beef? Hm. That doesn’t sound like it will go together, so I may have to think about it a bit more. But I want to grill peach halves if nothing else – have you ever grilled peaches? Yum! There’s a fabulous deepening of the flavors and I just love it.

Speaking of beets; I always liked them growing up, but had only had canned, pickled beets. Last year, while I was pregnant, we would get bundles of beets in our co-op. Roasted beets are delicious!! Who knew? A simple slice, toss with olive oil & salt, then roast at 350ish for 20 minutesish. Mmm. Toss the roasted beets with goat cheese or put them over a bed of spring greens.

Alright. It’s time to finish getting ready! I can’t wait to dance!

Nostalgia, or, When Blogging at Midnight…

I just stumbled on this video (produced by a Lynchburg photographer) and it made me so nostalgic & homesick for Holland, Michigan, and Hope College — not for the place so much as the memories. The dreamy fireworks sequence, and that song and so much keeps flooding back. 

While cleaning up my attic studio today, I came across two cassette tapes (remember those?) with individual broadcasts I did on 89.9 WTHS. I listened for awhile, since they contained many favorite songs. It was a little strange to hear my voice, now five years younger. That girl sounds so happy and content on air, but there were so many hidden insecurities, sort of these figurative monsters under the bed. Thankfully, I think I knew even then that the growing pains would someday subside. 

It’s hard to believe how out of touch I feel with college friends, or how much my life has changed since then. Listening to Sufjan Stevens or Rosie Thomas brings it all flooding back. Today the cassette tapes were warbling in the background while I lost myself in a painting and for a moment, I nearly forgot I had a daughter and husband downstairs. That I was painting in the attic of our house. That I was 27. In that moment, I could almost be 20 again (21? don’t know which years I taped the shows), talking into the microphone of the tiny studio in DeWitt, watching the students pause at the ATM. That radio studio doesn’t even exist anymore; the station moved after I graduated to the new digs in the Martha Miller Center. 

I played Sufjan’s student EP. He went to our college, we had his stuff in our music library even before he stormed onto the indie scene. Ever since, his songs have become intwined with my personal history. My roadtrip cds included “Chicago” even before it appeared as the soundtrack to the opening roadtrip sequence of Little Miss Sunshine. 

This post wasn’t meant to be a tribute to Sufjan, or a lame attempt at indie posturing. But it’s nearly 1 a.m. and everyone’s asleep except me – and just before I logged off for the night, I found this video and suddenly remembered flat tires in Ohio, a golden harvest moon rising above Grand Rapids, the Pine Grove, singing with Mary while she played her guitar, and so much more…

I was in love with the place

In my mind, in my mind

I made a lot of mistakes, 

In my mind, in my mind…

 

You can see John Carl’s video below:

we were in love from John Carl on Vimeo.

The creativity is flowing…

This morning, we went for breakfast at Starlight: sweet crepes with strawberries, bananas and Nutella (yum!) and then took a walk through the historic district end of our street and dropped jaws at the ornate stone scrollwork and the iron fenced backyards with rose trellises in full bloom.It was perfect, and hopefully the first of many such Saturday mornings. 

I spent the rest of the day setting up my attic studio. Found some hilarious childhood photos, a doll’s quilt I made as a child, a list of books I read each summer for a couple of years as a kid, etc. Rocked out to Cat Power, Mates of State, Rosie Thomas. Put a few coats of pale aqua paint on a few picture frames and restyled a clock to match. Took breaks to play with my darling little girl (and amazing hubby who is making this studio time possible). Took another break to run over and help Jill load up two chairs she bought at auction into our truck and back to her house. Took another break to make some Cuban style steaks. Mmm. 

And now? It’s that point in the night when the final montage begins to play and everyone gets the girl. I’m barely even watching the movie; Sofia is teething and took forever to get to sleep. So today is drawing to a close, and if tomorrow is only half as good as today, it will still be fairly swell. 

(among the many ideas swirling: finally creating a curtain for our front door, refashioning a couple of dresses, finishing the painting I worked on today, editing photos, gardening…we’ll see what happens…)

Inspired by these (and hoping to win!):

 

Vintage Wedding Frock (refashioned)

Sheer skirt

Scratch that whole feeling better business. I think I overdid it yesterday, caring for hubby & baby when I had only just started to go on the mend myself. I called in today, and am going back to bed. I did, however, move baby’s appointment from tomorrow to today. Mostly I did this out of a sense of professional courtesy and the realization that I probably have no personal time left for the year anyway, at this rate.

Besides, there’s going to be enough waiting for me tomorrow as it is.

For now, back to bed.

On juggling orange cupcakes and multiple deadlines

So, it’s been awhile. I went back to work three days after writing my last post. And yes, that was a month and a half ago. Is that all? two and a half months ago.

It’s been a bit of a blur: finishing our move into our lovely home, getting used to work, watching our daughter grow very nearly into a toddler. Weeks full of baby squeals (she’s oh so happy in the morning!), pumping and cleaning bottles and pumping again and cleaning bottles again, sunshine through our windows,  car trouble and health issues and more health issues, catching up on what went on in the office during maternity leave and starting numerous other projects since then, laundry and dishes and laundry and dishes…

You know how it goes. 

Yes, there’s much I haven’t taken time to write about. And of course, this weekend has been spent passing a stomach bug around our wee family, which means hubby & I have taken turns caring for baby when not sick. So here I am: sitting in a tank top & jeans, my desk covered in ginger ale, saltines & disinfectant wipes.

It’s no accident, then, that just now I hit an old bookmark button and finally finished reading an article that speaks to a bit to all of this chaos. I like the sound of her “gentle rebellion,” and think I need to keep the bookmark. Especially since I often stare at my ceiling before falling asleep, racking up the list of to-do’s back at the office, juggling the priorities and weighing the estimated time to complete them. 

(Hm. Apparently  my window of time to write has been drastically reduced–the happy squeals & coos have quickly turned to cranky fussing, though a quick time check says it’s too soon to be hunger. Maybe she’s bored. Daddy’s talking to her and that seems to be helping.) 

In the interest of time, the highlights of what I want to say: first, that I recently made some yummy orange coconut cupcakes with chocolate frosting for hubby’s birthday. Which, in the interest of time, were not homemade whatsoever, but completely from a box. Betty Crocker Orange Supreme mix, threw in a half cup of shredded coconut, and frosted with Betty Crocker milk chocolate frosting. Sprinkled some coconut on top & lit some sparkly candles. Yay. And, done.

Don’t get me wrong: when I have a minute, it’s homemade crepes with Nutella, strawberries & bananas (inspired by my favorite local cafe’s take on the Paris favorite).

But these days? Boxes are my friend. Quick & easy? Yes, please, even if it’s a recipe straight from Rachel Ray or Semi-Homemade (two of my least favorite cooking shows). Yep. We are eating a lot of pizza these days, simply because I can prep healthy toppings ahead of time & whip it together quickly when it’s time for dinner. Speaking of pizza: if anyone has a quick, preferably make-ahead recipe for pizza crust, I’d love it! 

(Hubby changed her diaper, bless his heart. She is back to happily cooing)

One of the other things I’ve been meaning to do but never get around to it is post more giveaway and/or recommended links! I have found so many fun things on other mommy blogs; it’s amazing what talent is out there, and how the internet has blown the doors wide open for stay work-at-home moms to share (and profit from!) their talents. One of my favorite blogs to catch up on is Grosgrain Fabulous (if you couldn’t tell from my previous posts!). 

Here are her latest giveaways – you put together quite the cute outfit if you won the picnic frock, a Swanki hat, and an Art Nest pincushion ring. Or for your little girl, check out this simple skirt she made! 

(In the meantime, Miss Princess has demanded her dinner and promptly fell asleep afterward. Too bad I’m too tired and have too much laundry waiting to spend much more time here…)

Finally, you have to check out this recent photo shoot by a fellow Lynchburg photographer (and she’s a work-at-home mom!). Can you say fabulous vision meets fabulous fashion?

And now, the laundry awaits. Sigh.

Serenity

I am writing once again as my baby & husband sleep. Thanks to my internal alarm clock, I’m wide awake and trying to ignore, for a moment, the massive clutter that surrounds me. We live in a lovely apartment in a lovely Victorian home. The living room is quite small, even for apartment standards, and with a sofa, chair, coffee table & playpen, we are in a maze every day. I am grateful for the roof over my head, and for the furniture we are blessed with – but I feel a bit squeezed. We closed on the house on Monday, so I have slowly begun filing the bills on my desk, starting boxes for Goodwill, cleaning out the refrigerator, but I am sitting here on the couch feeling as though my arms are pressed against my body, shoulders clenched, trapped by stuff. 

One goal for the new house: a place for everything, and everything in its place. Yes, I have an infant. Yes, there’s going to be more space for more stuff to accumulate faster! And soon, a baby crawling, then walking, and even more toys for her to scatter. But lately, my husband and I have begun to deal with each piece of mail when it arrives. Or, put something away after we use it. And in this moment, with the sunshine coming through the window against my shriveling potted plants (whoops – thankfully plant food works wonders!), I have hope that we can live an uncluttered life in our new home. 

 

Yesterday I scheduled a meeting with my boss to talk about the terms of my return to the office (my maternity leave ends today). An hour before, my cell phone drowned in the dirty dishes. My husband’s meeting was at 2 p.m. and not 4 p.m., but thankfully he could still take our daughter while I met with my boss at a coffeeshop (his choice of location). I was a wreck on the way over, but prayed for a moment and decided there was no point in panicking. I had no phone. I had just enough time to drop off Sofia and head over. I made it early and just breathed. My boss and I chatted for quite a bit about what was happening at our arts nonprofit – and then he asked, in about as many words, what I would like (or need) my schedule to look like. 

And so: I will work in the office in the morning, then pick up my sweet baby from daycare and work from home the rest of the day. This is an experiment, one that can end at any time if either of us feel it’s no longer working. 

 

So, so thankful!!!

 

 

On my (cluttered) fridge door is one of those lovely Quotable magnets: 

“Peace. It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart.” – unknown

Of love & art

 

The sun is rising over the river, spilling onto the city and into my apartment. I moved down south, in part, for just this: the glow of the sun against closed blinds, even in mid-January. The months of gloom in Michigan were too much for my soul. 

Espresso just bubbled up in the stovetop maker. For the moment, this and the steady rocking of the baby swing are the only sounds. I have tried to wake up all week to enjoy these moments, before my daughter wakes up with her all-consuming needs, before my husband staggers to the shower (he takes the 8 p.m. to 1 a.m. shift) and then out to work. 

Perhaps today I will wet my paintbrushes, or write a poem. Perhaps all I can do is keep up with the diapers and feedings and changing of soiled clothing. Perhaps. This moment is mine, all mine, when the day lies blank before me. 

My husband looked at our daughter, sometime in the blur of her first few days, and wondered aloud if she will paint, or pick up a camera, just like her momma. We can’t wait to see who she becomes, and to encourage her to thrive. In that vein, I want to put Praise Song for the Day, the poem that Elizabeth Alexander wrote for the inauguration, in Sofia’s baby book.

Anything is possible, my darling. Anything.  

In today's sharp sparkle, this winter air,
any thing can be made, any sentence begun.
On the brink, on the brim, on the cusp,

praise song for walking forward in that light.
-from "Praise Song for the Day," Elizabeth Alexander

Hopin’ and wishin’

Last night was rough with our little stinker — she’s slightly sick, with a lesser version of the cold that knocked out her parents last week. But though a few more hours of sleep while she naps would be heaven, as soon as I woke up for her 7 a.m. feeding, I turned on the TV, made some café con leche, and settled in to watch history unfold.

If we didn’t have a three-week-old baby, we would have tried to make the drive. But waking up to a dusting of snow and seeing the crowds on TV made me thankful that we sheltered our poor sick baby. I can’t wait to explain the importance of this day to my daughter someday! We watched part of the History Channel’s biography of Martin Luther King, Jr., last night, keeping it on in the background as we cooked dinners for the rest of the week and fed our sick baby. I wished I could have sat down to watch the whole special; I got chills relistening to his speeches, and enjoyed seeing the photos of King relaxing with his children. I’m glad I saw what I did; it was a huge reminder of the significance of today’s events. 

My husband became a citizen last year, in time to register to vote. Suffice to say that my husband is Pakistani and has had to deal with the profiling at airports, and numerous other misunderstandings because of his culture & religion. We are hopeful that today’s events mean our daughter might face a more understanding climate as she grows up, that it might open doors that have been reluctant to open in our nation thus far. 

The Obamas just arrived at the White House, and Michelle Obama gave Laura Bush a journal and pen for her memoirs. A sweet touch, I think.

I think I’m going to pull out my own art and writing supplies and bring them into the living room to journal as I watch today’s events unfold. 

Finally, I’m bursting with other news: I won the Bella Wish giveaway this month! I can’t wait to wear her lovely art! 

 

I won! I won!